Childhood experiences, including exposure to alcoholism, along with the gaslighting and denials from being married to an alcoholic, have left Sheri facing real challenges battling feelings of unworthiness. Anyone who thinks the loved one of an alcoholic should just, “Get over it,” really needs to listen to this honest and painful conversation.
Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener’s question. Do you want to ask the couple something too? if so, send your question to matt@SoberAndUnashamed.com.
If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.
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Unworthy of happiness is what I would say. It’s the core of my personal recovery. Unworthy for so many reasons steaming from dark childhood trauma.
When in reality we were made perfectly by Jesus! Talk about being worthy!!!
Love this episode. Spoke directly to my soul and hopefully my husband will listen. It definitely been a huge part of our marriage story.
I wish you didn’t relate to this, Mindy, but since you do, thank you for sharing your perspective!
Unworthy, unimportant, rejected. I interpreted my husband’s drinking as a direct rejection of me, personally. He chose alcohol over me, over and over and over again. And when he stopped drinking 20 years ago, and even before, he chose work over me, and still does. So no matter what he says to compliment me, I don’t believe it because his actions don’t back it up. Unfortunately, I have generalized these feelings to all other relationships and I’m bracing for rejection all the time. Now, when my adult children drink at all, I immediately take it personally and feel rejected, unimportant, and unworthy. And, of course, my emotional reaction does, in fact, push them away.
I can’t tell you how much finding your book, Sober Evolution, has meant to me. I just finished it and I am just starting to realize how much healing I need to do. Thank you for acknowledging and validating my pain. I also didn’t realize how much I needed to say this and for someone to hear it. I will be joining Echoes of Recovery . . .
Wow, Louri! I wish you didn’t need this kind of connection, but I’m sure glad you found us. What an important comment. I hope it inspires others to know they are not alone.