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We are Sheri and Matt Salis, and our marriage survived active alcoholism. We were shocked to find our relationship in even more trouble in recovery because of the pain, lack of trust and years of resentment that sobriety exposed. But we are making it work, and we are sharing our painful story with the millions of alcoholic couples dealing with both active alcoholism, and also the challenges of recovery.

Ep267 – Both Sides of Addiction with Alan Thompson

If you have experienced religious trauma, work stress, marriage distress, alcohol use disorder or the problematic drinking of a family member, this conversation has something for you. Alan Thompson has experienced addiction in a painfully wide variety of ways, and he is bold and brave to talk about it with vulnerability and authenticity. If you are ready so start healing from your own drinking, please consider joining us in our SHOUT Sobriety program.

Ep266 – The Fallacy of Control

We are all familiar with the addictions that are associated with moral failings and a lack of willpower - stigmatized addictions to alcohol and other drugs, for example. But there are also addictions that are glorified in our society. Sheri and Matt discuss addiction to power control, and how there is a better path than trying to control something as uncontrollable as addiction. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

Ep265 – Parenting in Recovery

Sheri and Matt have talked a lot about the impact of Matt's drinking on their kids. On this episode, the couple talks about the impact of recovery on how they parent. With emotional safety as the guiding principle, it is interesting how much they have both changed when interacting with their kids. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

Ep264 – Live Resentment Processing

You have probably heard Sheri and Matt talk about the importance of resentment processing. Now, on this episode, listen to the couple work through real resentments. They discuss both old resentments from Matt's drinking days, and also new resentments that occur in long-term sobriety. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

Ep263 – How Does Safety Dissolve?

We talk a lot about a lack of emotional safety in committed partnerships. But how do we get there? What societal, generational and toxic factors dissolve the emotional safety between people who love each other? If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

Ep262 – AnnMarie’s Transition Home

AnnMarie's divorce was final one year ago, and her physical, mental and emotional transition that has taken place over the past 12 months is remarkable. She is amazed at how she feels now, and she blesses us with a vivid description of what she encountered as she removed herself from her alcoholic marriage. Check out the all new Untoxicated Vodcast YouTube channel with short videos about life in an alcoholic relationship. You can have the videos delivered to your inbox by subscribing to our email list on SoberAndUnashamed.com. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

Ep261 – Emotional Intimacy First

Intimacy repair work starts with building emotional intimacy. Even when we crave the connection of physical contact, if the emotional foundation has not been established and nurtured, then sex will feel unfulfilling, and even destructive. Learn about the work of intimacy repair, and hear Matt accidentally stumble upon Sheri's nickname from her high school job. Check out the all new Untoxicated Vodcast YouTube channel with short videos about life in an alcoholic relationship. You can have the videos delivered to your inbox by subscribing to our email list on SoberAndUnashamed.com. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.  

Ep260 – Luke on Staying Sober through Divorce

When we met Luke, he was ready to get serious about sobriety, and he was eager to recover his marriage. Now, months later, he is making serious progress in recovery, but Luke's marriage has dissolved. Please listen to Luke share his raw and vulnerable story of triumph through heartbreak. Check out the all new Untoxicated Vodcast YouTube channel with short videos about life in an alcoholic relationship. You can have the videos delivered to your inbox by subscribing to our email list on SoberAndUnashamed.com. If you are ready to explore sobriety and recovery, please check out our SHOUT Sobriety program.

Ep259 – How Needing to be Needed Leads to Addiction

Cheap Trick had it half right. As Sheri and Matt break down, it is much healthier if, "I want you to want me," than if, "I need you to need me." Need versus want. Love versus like. Significant nuance as our society maneuvers through a monumental shift in cultural role changes that impact relationships in consequential ways. Sheri and Matt are about to launch the Untoxicated Vodcast YouTube channel with short videos about life in an alcoholic relationship. You can have the videos delivered to your inbox by subscribing to our email list on SoberAndUnashamed.com. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

Ep258 – 365 Days without a Relationship Relapse

Some people count their sobriety days. For Sheri and Matt, sobriety is just a prerequisite. The really exciting day count comes as they cross over a full year without a relationship relapse. No yelling. No name calling. No vindictive blaming. No meltdowns all the way around the calendar. Is avoiding relationship relapse a strategy, or a result of other hard work? Listen to Sheri's take on how they accomplished this major milestone. Sheri and Matt are about to launch the Untoxicated Vodcast YouTube channel with short videos about life in an alcoholic relationship. You can have the videos delivered to your inbox by subscribing to our email list on SoberAndUnashamed.com. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.
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