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We are Sheri and Matt Salis, and our marriage survived active alcoholism. We were shocked to find our relationship in even more trouble in recovery because of the pain, lack of trust and years of resentment that sobriety exposed. But we are making it work, and we are sharing our painful story with the millions of alcoholic couples dealing with both active alcoholism, and also the challenges of recovery.

Ep263 – How Does Safety Dissolve?

We talk a lot about a lack of emotional safety in committed partnerships. But how do we get there? What societal, generational and toxic factors dissolve the emotional safety between people who love each other? If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

Ep262 – AnnMarie’s Transition Home

AnnMarie's divorce was final one year ago, and her physical, mental and emotional transition that has taken place over the past 12 months is remarkable. She is amazed at how she feels now, and she blesses us with a vivid description of what she encountered as she removed herself from her alcoholic marriage. Check out the all new Untoxicated Vodcast YouTube channel with short videos about life in an alcoholic relationship. You can have the videos delivered to your inbox by subscribing to our email list on SoberAndUnashamed.com. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

Ep261 – Emotional Intimacy First

Intimacy repair work starts with building emotional intimacy. Even when we crave the connection of physical contact, if the emotional foundation has not been established and nurtured, then sex will feel unfulfilling, and even destructive. Learn about the work of intimacy repair, and hear Matt accidentally stumble upon Sheri's nickname from her high school job. Check out the all new Untoxicated Vodcast YouTube channel with short videos about life in an alcoholic relationship. You can have the videos delivered to your inbox by subscribing to our email list on SoberAndUnashamed.com. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.  

Ep260 – Luke on Staying Sober through Divorce

When we met Luke, he was ready to get serious about sobriety, and he was eager to recover his marriage. Now, months later, he is making serious progress in recovery, but Luke's marriage has dissolved. Please listen to Luke share his raw and vulnerable story of triumph through heartbreak. Check out the all new Untoxicated Vodcast YouTube channel with short videos about life in an alcoholic relationship. You can have the videos delivered to your inbox by subscribing to our email list on SoberAndUnashamed.com. If you are ready to explore sobriety and recovery, please check out our SHOUT Sobriety program.

Ep259 – How Needing to be Needed Leads to Addiction

Cheap Trick had it half right. As Sheri and Matt break down, it is much healthier if, "I want you to want me," than if, "I need you to need me." Need versus want. Love versus like. Significant nuance as our society maneuvers through a monumental shift in cultural role changes that impact relationships in consequential ways. Sheri and Matt are about to launch the Untoxicated Vodcast YouTube channel with short videos about life in an alcoholic relationship. You can have the videos delivered to your inbox by subscribing to our email list on SoberAndUnashamed.com. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

Ep258 – 365 Days without a Relationship Relapse

Some people count their sobriety days. For Sheri and Matt, sobriety is just a prerequisite. The really exciting day count comes as they cross over a full year without a relationship relapse. No yelling. No name calling. No vindictive blaming. No meltdowns all the way around the calendar. Is avoiding relationship relapse a strategy, or a result of other hard work? Listen to Sheri's take on how they accomplished this major milestone. Sheri and Matt are about to launch the Untoxicated Vodcast YouTube channel with short videos about life in an alcoholic relationship. You can have the videos delivered to your inbox by subscribing to our email list on SoberAndUnashamed.com. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

Ep257 – Victoria from Deep In It

Trigger warning: domestic violence This is a unique and risky episode because Victoria is currently "in it." This is not a story with an ending, it is trauma and chaos experienced in real time. Listen to Victoria explain her confusion and uncertainty as she lives through a, "textbook version of the Man vs. Alcohol tragedy." Sheri and Matt are about to launch the Untoxicated Vodcast YouTube channel with short videos about life in an alcoholic relationship. You can have the videos delivered to your inbox by subscribing to our email list on SoberAndUnashamed.com. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

Ep256 – The Value of Strong Independent Women

From kayak cross to gymnastics, where else would you turn for your Olympics recap than to Sheri and Matt. This episode has it all: compliments for Alcoholics Anonymous, celebration for partners who fill their own buckets, further emphasis on emotional safety, a tragic tale of misinterpreted detachment, and a little squabble about Shaquille O'Neal's height. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

Ep255 – Meeting Your Changing Needs Roundtable

The contrast between their few identifiable needs when they met their partners, and their clear needs after suffering through an alcoholic relationship, is striking. Please listen to Nickie, Eve, Melanie, Kristin, Nicole, Lauren, Ali and Julie live from the third annual Echoes of Recovery summer retreat in the Rocky Mountains. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

Ep254 – Are Resentments Holding You Back?

Sheri and Matt talk a lot about processing resentments together, and how it helps repair their relationship. But what if your partner is not available, not willing or not capable of processing resentments with you? Sheri and Matt explore a solo process of digging deep into the "why," analyzing the fear and finding empathy for the benefit of the person stuck holding onto resentments. If you would like to learn more about our SHOUT Sobriety program for high functioning alcoholics seeking sobriety, or our Echoes of Recovery program for the loved ones of alcoholics, please join us for a free, no-strings-attached information and Q&A session Thursday, August 1st at 6:30pm MDT. To request the ZOOM link, please send an email to [email protected].
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