Untoxicated Podcast – Insecurity-Instinct-Evolve: Relationships in Recovery

Addiction
Alcohol
Recovery
Relationship

Ep175 – Couples Roundtable: The Threat of Relapse

Eight loving, empathetic, hard-working alcoholism survivors sitting around a big microphone - it's a roundtable episode recorded during our winter Marriagevolution Couples Retreat in the mountains of Colorado. Two couples are nearing the end of their first year of sobriety, the third couple has over three years, and Sheri and Matt are starting their seventh year. So there is a variety of experiences, opinions and emotions on full display. Clear communication and respect - respect for each other and respect for all of the possibilities - are two takeaways on which all eight participants agree. This episode is honest, emotional, and as loving as sound waves digitally stored on the internet can be. If you and your partner are working to restore your relationship in sobriety, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Marriagevolution program.

Addiction
Alcohol
Recovery
Relationship

Ep174 – Reconciling the Joys of Alcohol

There is no arguing the fact that without alcohol, Sheri and Matt would never have met. It is also an undisputed reality that some of the best times the couple ever experienced were enhanced by alcohol. Now that Sheri and Matt openly despise alcohol for all of the damage it brought to their family, a reconciliation is in order. Before they discuss reconciling the joy and destruction of alcohol, Sheri and Matt answer a listener question about finding confidence and reconnection in sobriety, while the potential for relapse looms. Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener’s question. Do you want to ask the couple something too? if so, send your question to matt@SoberAndUnashamed.com. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

Addiction
Alcohol
Recovery
Relationship

Ep173 – Blame Won’t Fix It

Blame the alcohol, or the alcoholism, but don't blame the person. We say it all the time. But what if the blame isn't just something that occurs once the addiction is firmly in place? What if blame and criticism and attempts to change our partners is one of the underlying causes of addiction? Sheri and Matt discuss the impact of years of mutual criticism and attempts to change each other. And as you'll hear on this episode, they are much happier now just laughing at each other. Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener’s question. Do you want to ask the couple something too? if so, send your question to matt@SoberAndUnashamed.com. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

Addiction
Alcohol
Recovery
Relationship

Ep172 – Here Comes the Hard Part

So you made it through the holidays...well, definitely don't let your guard down yet. January is really hard in early sobriety, and it is hard for the loved ones trying to avoid emotional relapses. On this episode, Sheri and Matt discuss the emotional drivers from the holidays that impact our self-esteem, and they give tips about what to do to have a mentally healthy start to the year. Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener’s question. Do you want to ask the couple something too? if so, send your question to matt@SoberAndUnashamed.com. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

Addiction
Alcohol
Recovery

Ep171 – Community SHOUT-Outs

On this one-of-a-kind episode, Sheri and Matt have compiled the answers to this simple prompt from 17 participants in the SHOUT Sobriety and Echoes of Recovery groups: What does community mean to you? There are a lot of resonating sentiments and powerful statements in the words of the people who understand the transformational impact of community. To move past the Sheri and Matt introduction to the clips from our people, skip to the 19 minute mark. Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener’s question. Do you want to ask the couple something too? if so, send your question to matt@SoberAndUnashamed.com. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program. If you are a high functioning alcoholic seeking to add community to your recovery, please check out our SHOUT Sobriety program.

Addiction
Alcohol
Family
Teens

Ep170 – Generational Trauma: Breaking the Cycle

Sheri and Matt knew they would hand down important lessons about faith and work ethic and loyalty and love of family to their kids. What they didn't initially know was that they would also hand down troubling mannerisms, emotions and disruptions to the nervous system that would haunt their children. And the really complex part is that now that they know, there are still things Sheri and Matt struggle to stop reinforcing. I guess they learned their generationally traumatic lessons well. Breaking the cycle is hard. Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener's question. Do you want to ask the couple something too? if so, send your question to matt@SoberAndUnashamed.com. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

Addiction
Alcohol
Recovery
Relationship

Ep169 – Unworthy

Childhood experiences, including exposure to alcoholism, along with the gaslighting and denials from being married to an alcoholic, have left Sheri facing real challenges battling feelings of unworthiness. Anyone who thinks the loved one of an alcoholic should just, "Get over it," really needs to listen to this honest and painful conversation. Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener's question. Do you want to ask the couple something too? if so, send your question to matt@SoberAndUnashamed.com. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

Addiction
Alcohol
Relationship
Sex

Ep168 – The Orgasm Gap and Addiction: Connecting the Dots

The only thing Matt knew about a connection between orgasms and addiction when he was in active alcoholism was that he sure liked to have sex when he was drinking. But now he has done the research, and Sheri and Matt connect the dots explaining the reason for the orgasm gap between men and women, and how challenges with sexual pleasure and satisfaction are both an underlying cause of, and also a result from, alcoholism. Not only do they identify this problem that starts in K-12 public school education, but they also invite Kathy back to the podcast to discuss the steps we can take to influence public policy in a way that helps narrow the orgasm gap resulting in a positive impact on addiction prevention and recovery. Whoa, that is a lot of deep and taboo ground to cover in an hour. And Matt only blushes a little when he talks about the clitoris. To read the associated blog post on Sober and Unashamed, and for the details about the research studies Matt references on this episode, please click here. Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener's question. Do you want to ask the couple something too? If so, send your question to matt@SoberAndUnashamed.com.

Addiction
Alcohol
Recovery

Ep167 – No Longer Pretending with Karen and Adam

A manicured lawn, beautiful social media photos, and a well-kept house are often signs that something sinister lurks hiding behind the perfection. On this episode, Sheri and Matt welcome Karen and Adam to the conversation because of their experiences with no longer pretending. They discuss the incredible relief found in moving past the stoic wall, refusing to portray everything as "fine," and finding a communities - both small and large - where we can be 100% authentic. What goes up, must come down. But the things we push down, eventually, must come up and out, too. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

Addiction
Alcohol

Ep166 – When Motivation Morphs into Addiction

Do you find satisfaction in an accomplishment, or does an achievement just drive you to keep pushing forward? If you, like Matt, relate to the latter, watch out! You just might be on a path toward addiction. On this episode, Sheri and Matt take a listener's question, and explain how motivation contributed to Matt's high-functioning alcoholism. Do you want to ask Sheri and Matt a question too? if so, send your question to matt@SoberAndUnashamed.com. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.