Untoxicated Podcast – Insecurity-Instinct-Evolve: Relationships in Recovery

Ep219 – Barbara’s Grief, Guilt and Growth

*** Warning: suicide and death are discussed Barbara first appeared on the podcast almost three years ago on Ep70 when she shared the story of her husband's alcoholism that led to her becoming a living organ donor before their eventual divorce. Barbara's story has progressed significantly, and so has her understanding of the impact of alcohol on her and the man she loved. The emotional twists and turns, drenched in guilt and grief, might surprise you. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

Ep218 – Holiday Triggers and the Healing Power of Time

Traditions and triggers go hand in hand, and at no time is that more prevalent than during the holiday season. Sheri and Matt discuss how triggers and traditions have changed for them over time. They also brag about their credentials, and the talents derived from long toes, in a cringey sort of way. Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener’s question Do you want to ask the couple something too? if so, send your question to [email protected]. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

Ep217 – Separation Roundtable: The Critical Mindset Shift

We did not set out to record three episodes on the topic of relationship separation, but the response to parts one and two has been overwhelming, so we are proud to bring you this third installment in our unintentional series. Listen for the unmistakable balance of pride, humility, vulnerability and commitment in the voices of our three panelists who all credit the separation demanded by their spouses as being foundational in their sobriety and relationship recovery progress. Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener’s question Do you want to ask the couple something too? if so, send your question to [email protected]. If you are a drinker seeking sobriety, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our SHOUT Sobriety program.

Ep216 – Lowered Standards and Disappointing Outcomes

***Trigger Warning - Talk of Self Harm and Suicide It is common knowledge that alcoholism is a progressive disease in relation to the volume and frequency of consumption. What is rarely considered is that the loved ones of alcoholics lower their own standards in a progressive way as well. In this episode, Sheri and Matt talk about the origins of our baseline standards, progressive deterioration, and how important it is to return to baseline in recovery. Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener’s question Do you want to ask the couple something too? if so, send your question to [email protected]. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

Ep215 – Expectations

When is recovery over? When can we call declare success? Sheri and Matt discuss the baseline expectations that everyone deserves to have met in a thriving, loving relationship. They also discuss the expectations that lead to disappointment, and how those unmet expectations are often misdiagnosed as an indication that the person or the relationship isn't successful in recovery. (And the Chris is Chris Wallace...son of Mike Wallace. (listen and find out)) Join our introductory session of The Developing Story for teens who have experienced alcoholism in their households on November 6th. For free access to this session, provide your contact information at TheDevelopingStory.org. Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener’s question Do you want to ask the couple something too? if so, send your question to [email protected]. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

Ep214 – The Healing Power of Separation Roundtable

Sheri and Matt welcome Nicole, Lisa, Sarah, Shannon and Kelly to the podcast to share their real-life experiences with separation from their alcoholic spouses. Some of the separations led to divorce. Some of the separations led to sobriety and reconciliation. Some of the separations are new, and some have transpired over years. The two things all of our panelists have in common is that they have experienced the healing power of separation, and they are brave enough to share their stories for the benefit of our Untoxicated listeners. Join our introductory session of The Developing Story for teens who have experienced alcoholism in their households on November 6th. For free access to this session, provide your contact information at TheDevelopingStory.org. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

Ep213 – Detachment and Separation

Sheri and Matt deal with Matt's hypocrisy about supporting detachment in alcoholic relationships. up to and including physical separation, when the couple never got separated themselves during his active addiction or recovery. Join our introductory session of The Developing Story for teens who have experienced alcoholism in their households on November 6th. For free access to this session, provide your contact information at TheDevelopingStory.org. Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener’s question Do you want to ask the couple something too? if so, send your question to [email protected]. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

Ep212 – Curiosity in Relationship Recovery

No transition was more important to Sheri's and Matt's relationship recovery than when Matt stopped telling Sheri what she was doing wrong and started trying to understand why she felt the way she did. It was a major shift that saved their marriage, and they talk all about it on this episode. Join our introductory session of The Developing Story for teens who have experienced alcoholism in their households on November 6th. For free access to this session, provide your contact information at TheDevelopingStory.org. Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener’s question Do you want to ask the couple something too? if so, send your question to [email protected]. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

Ep211 – The Recovery Revolution with Cory Martin

Comedian and Recovery Coach, Cory Martin, joins Sheri and Matt for this insightful and deep episode That's right, she's not just about laughs. Cory pairs humor with some unconventional and well thought out ideas and perspectives including her 7 Active Principles of Conscious Recovery. She challenges some of Sheri's and Matt's thinking, and shares stories of how her experiences have informed her innovative ideas. If you like what you hear, check out Cory's programs for the loved ones of alcoholics at The Recovery Revolution website, and follow @therecoveryrevolution on Instagram. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

Ep210 – Is My Husband’s Alcoholism My Fault?

No. That's the short version of the title question's answer. An emphatic, "no," in fact. But as with most of the world's hard-to-solve problems, there is much more to the story. On this episode, Sheri and Matt breakdown what happens in a alcoholic relationship breakdown, the roles of the partners, and how the relationship can be repaired. Sheri and Matt start the episode by answering a listener’s question Do you want to ask the couple something too? if so, send your question to [email protected]. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.