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We are Sheri and Matt Salis, and our marriage survived active alcoholism. We were shocked to find our relationship in even more trouble in recovery because of the pain, lack of trust and years of resentment that sobriety exposed. But we are making it work, and we are sharing our painful story with the millions of alcoholic couples dealing with both active alcoholism, and also the challenges of recovery.

Ep271 – The Emotional Safety Journal

Physical abuse and sexual abuse are more widely understood with societally agreed upon red lines that are not to be crossed. Emotional abuse, on the other hand, is less obvious and less universally understood. But it is every bit as dangerous, and that's why Matt has started keeping an Emotional Safety Journal. Listen to the undisputable benefits of the ESJ, and consider joining Matt in his daily ritual. Speaking of daily rituals, this episode has a lot of toilet talk. Consider yourself warned. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

Ep270 – The TWFO Couple Paige and Matt Robinson

Paige and Matt Robinson have survived Matt's addiction to opiates and alcohol, and now they are doing a ton to help others, especially spouses, find their way out. Listen to how they managed the lies and hiding, and how they process resentments as their marriage thrives. To learn more about Paige and Matt and their work, please visit their website and check out their Till the Wheels Fall Off podcast, online community and recovery course for the spouses of people who have suffered from addiction. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

Ep269 – When Behavior Deteriorates Faster than We can Lower Our Standards

Self-esteem building is critical to both the drinker and the loved ones in recovery from addiction. On this episode, Sheri and Matt explore the role deteriorating self-esteem plays in the spiral into addiction. They also talk about the time Sheri drank excessively to medicate her hatred of Fenway Park hotdogs, and Matt dismisses theater kids and musicians like an arrogant jock wanna be. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

Ep268 – Trust and Detachment IRL

We simply cannot live without trust. Trust is foundational to human existence, and Sheri and Matt talk about how naive alcoholics are who expect trust to return with short-term sobriety. They also discuss a real-life example of using detachment to navigate the untrustworthy. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

Ep267 – Both Sides of Addiction with Alan Thompson

If you have experienced religious trauma, work stress, marriage distress, alcohol use disorder or the problematic drinking of a family member, this conversation has something for you. Alan Thompson has experienced addiction in a painfully wide variety of ways, and he is bold and brave to talk about it with vulnerability and authenticity. If you are ready so start healing from your own drinking, please consider joining us in our SHOUT Sobriety program.

Ep266 – The Fallacy of Control

We are all familiar with the addictions that are associated with moral failings and a lack of willpower - stigmatized addictions to alcohol and other drugs, for example. But there are also addictions that are glorified in our society. Sheri and Matt discuss addiction to power control, and how there is a better path than trying to control something as uncontrollable as addiction. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

Ep265 – Parenting in Recovery

Sheri and Matt have talked a lot about the impact of Matt's drinking on their kids. On this episode, the couple talks about the impact of recovery on how they parent. With emotional safety as the guiding principle, it is interesting how much they have both changed when interacting with their kids. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

Ep264 – Live Resentment Processing

You have probably heard Sheri and Matt talk about the importance of resentment processing. Now, on this episode, listen to the couple work through real resentments. They discuss both old resentments from Matt's drinking days, and also new resentments that occur in long-term sobriety. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

Ep263 – How Does Safety Dissolve?

We talk a lot about a lack of emotional safety in committed partnerships. But how do we get there? What societal, generational and toxic factors dissolve the emotional safety between people who love each other? If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.

Ep262 – AnnMarie’s Transition Home

AnnMarie's divorce was final one year ago, and her physical, mental and emotional transition that has taken place over the past 12 months is remarkable. She is amazed at how she feels now, and she blesses us with a vivid description of what she encountered as she removed herself from her alcoholic marriage. Check out the all new Untoxicated Vodcast YouTube channel with short videos about life in an alcoholic relationship. You can have the videos delivered to your inbox by subscribing to our email list on SoberAndUnashamed.com. If you love or loved an alcoholic, and your recovery could benefit from connection with people who understand, please check out our Echoes of Recovery program.
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